"The time has come," the Walrus said, "To talk of many things: Of shoes, and ships, and sealing-wax, of cabbages, and kings, And why the sea is boiling hot, And whether pigs have wings..."

I feel as though the time has come to step away from my skin. To take a look at what I've become, what I've lost, what I've won, and if I'm happy. Can I answers those? Yes. I have become a hermit. I don't care to see anyone anymore. I try and avoid it. Not with everyone but the less interaction with the outside world the better. Am I happy? That's such a loaded question. Yes I am because I have this one wonderful person in my life who has reminded me that I am alive, wonderful, and beautiful. Hes been a saint. He is the only reason why I even want to leave the house. Its so very unexpected, but I wouldn't change any of it. Am I happy? No, because I'm starting to realize how different we are, how much everything has changed. I'm not big on change, I don't even like changing the way I do my make up. Let alone anything else major in my life. But its okay, everything happens for a reason. We move on, and let things go to make room for new adventures, new stories, and new memories. I have to learn to let go and move on. I have a whole network of people that love me no matter what, that's a really wonderful reason to be happy. I have lost my mind, but won a sense of acceptance of who I am and everything that makes me, well, me.

As time rolls on, I know that nothing will be as it is in this very moment. People will enter and leave my life like a constant revolving door. I have to be okay with that. There is no way around that. I still am scared of what forever will bring me, but I'm ready to take on this adventure. In the words of Peter Pan "to love would be an awfully big adventure" which is the new motto of my life. Love use to scare me, but now I'm going to love as often as I can.

I'm trying to be happy, I'm trying to make it. All things considered, I'm doing well.